Saturday, January 21, 2012

Being Super Mom

Working sucks. Maybe because my job is so difficult. I have to go get re-certified for the containments and take downs, which I have already had to do on my job. Let me just show you exactly how my Monday went.

Those are grab marks from a sixteen year old kid with autism that is non-verbal. I got whomped on. I was so glad to get home and just cuddle with my baby. Sure it was eleven at night, but I was so happy to not be at work. But this weekend I have some time off which is really nice. I've gotten to spend every second with Z. I didn't realize how much I would miss her.

Also - I have a sucky time pumping at work. It's total bullshit that I can't manage to get time to pump. Legally they should allow me to have a break every three hours, but in my workplace - that is just no way to get that in. I don't work in the office anymore. It's crappy getting in the face and having to block a biter from attacking peers.

Started an auxiliary blog for nursing stuff - I call it The Ugly Shirt Project. Basically it's a collection of exceptionally bad pictures of me. I'm looking for authors. Pass it on.

In other news, my baby girl turned two months last Wednesday. She's such a cute, and I just love her smiles. Recently I've discovered she likes pacifiers, which bothers me because I'm so anti-paci. Mostly because of four-year-olds that obviously don't need them, and children that throw tantrums over it. I want to raise a child that won't throw a tantrum, and can handle things with grace. Like the Jimmy Kimmel challenge where parents played a prank on their kids, and tape the reactions. You can tell that these kids haven't been taught any sort of hubris, and are a little spoiled. I want a kid that if that prank was pulled she'd shrug and say she loved me.

2 Months! Smiley baby!
I love playing with Z. She's got such a crazy personality, and likes to stay up super late. And she's kicky and punchy sometimes. A day off rocks cause we can stay home all day, snack and nap.

Falcon PUNCH!
Because I have to juggle more than just taking care of her, the laundry, most of the cooking and cleaning, I find myself stretched thin (like butter spread over too much bread - Bilbo Baggins). Trying to keep up with anything is difficult, and I hate pumping so she can have food when I am at work. I can't manage to remember anything, and then get ragged on about it. Hate that, I have plenty to do anyway. But packing up me, Z, diaper bag, milk lunchbox, my work bag,'s just a lot to all remember. It's all I can do to just sleep and not suck at life all the time.

I want a life that isn't so difficult. But I don't want to have a boring life either. I have to be super mom, and all I want is a shower.

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