Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Change Is Still Ok.

There has been a few changes again to my life.

Sean and I are getting back together. Which has been a really different sort of feeling. I feel drawn to him, and I care about him deeply, but the past few months have been emotionally draining. It's hard to let myself be open and really give him any sort of emotional connection. I don't want things to go exactly back to where they were, but there have been some changes. I wish I could be open with what has changed, but I feel like I would be judged by my readers (few and conservative as they are, no offence). Changes that I support and feel good about, but the rest of the world would think are stupid or dangerous.

Work is stressing me out as well, and I feel like its just too much some days. I wish I had something I was actually excited to go to. And maybe drop my status so I can have more time to devote to Zelda. Every evening is turning out to not fill my mom-fix.

Another load of his clothes have come back to the apartment. :)

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Happy Birthday Zelda!

Eat all the cake.
Reading with Mommy. 
My attempt at a cake.
Ready to blow out the candle with Donnie.

My soulmate turns one today. I never have believed in true love, but I know that one year ago I met the most important person in my life. She is the wonderful, evil, curious, feisty child I call my daughter. She was also lucky enough to have two parties, one with my extended family and one with Sean's family.

Getting ready for the Santa Parade.
Walking to 'Wreck-It Ralph' with Daddy.
Happy Birthday Zelda Skye!
Beautiful cake from Grandma Kat.
And no family gathering is complete without a little bit of drama. I'm trying to be gracious, so I will save my true feelings for another day. Right now, I am focusing on my daughter's beautiful day, and making this day special for her.

Saturday, November 3, 2012

Pumpkin Pie Cake

I was scrolling the internet, and found this amazing recipe for pumpkin pie cupcakes. I didn't have the brain for making the cupcakes, so I just made some goddamn cake. Yesterday I did the meijer brand recipe for pumpkin pie, and figured I was on a pumpkin streak!

Because I'm lazy as all get out, I decided to use a crust from the store. I made the cake with double the amount of cinnamon because it sounded better, but the rest of it I just did as it told me.

It wasn't a particularly hard recipe, just time consuming with waiting for everything to cool down.

Pumpkin pie top, graham cracker crust, vanilla spice cake.
I still suck at baking.

And I met someone. Pretty cool person, couple of dates, super casual, definitely going to be a good friendship if not more.

This is what she brought for the first time meeting Zelda.

Call him Plink.

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Our First Samhain!

Zelda was ready for the holiday.
We celebrated Halloween as a family. Not just me and Z, but with her dad too. It was nice to go out together, have some food, and be together. We walked around the Byron Center neighborhoods for about an hour before it was just too cold and too wet.

I had to change out of my full costume as Pam from Archer, and went in sweatpants and sweatshirt because it was so cold.

Zelda and I in our costumes. 
Spending time with Sean has been much better since our mediation. Finally we have some parenting time taken care of, and things are seeming to settle down. I'm trying to be a better parent and person through this time in my life.

At the end of the day, I still have Z. I still have everything I forgot to ask for. She's my beautiful one, and I can't wait to celebrate her birthday.